It is my partner's birthday. There's a lot to say. But little time. So, I just choose to attempt at sounding funny... to feel happy...
First off, I am borrowing these lines from somewhere on the web. At first glance, the jokes sound stupid. Overtime, though, some; if not most, ring true :-)
1. Men are like .......Laxatives ..... they irritate the crap out of you.
2. Men are like ......Bananas ...... the older they get, the less firm they are.
3. Men are like .......Weather ..... nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like .....Blenders ... you need One, but you're not quite sure why.
5. Men are like .....Chocolate Bars ... sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like ....Commercials ...... you can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like Department Stores .... their clothes are always 1/2 off.
8. Men are like .. Government Bonds ... . they take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like .. Mascara ..... they usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like ......Popcorn ..... they satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like .......Lava Lamps ... fun to look at, but not very bright.
12. Men are like Parking Spots ....... all the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.
I am sure my partner heard or even gave this joke before. I hope he enjoys it again.
" A guy goes into a bar and sits beside a big lady. He says to her, Boy! You have a big butt!!
She goes...why you--- and starts smacking him around.
And so, he goes in the men's room, fixes himself up, combs, and fixes his hair.
He straightens out his glasses, puts his teeth back in, etc. He goes back and sits
beside the same lady.
He says to her, Boy! You got small boobs. She says, Do I really?
He says, yeah! And I know how you can make em bigger.
She asks -- how?
He says you go into the ladies room, take your bra and shirt off, take a whole bunch of toilet paper and keep wiping and rubbing between your boobs.
She says oh my God! Do you think that will really work for me?
He says, why wouldnt it? It worked on your big butt didn't it?"
Anyway, I was afraid I would not be able to give my partner a birthday lunch. But the day was saved by Vickie.
Food remained simple. Beef steak, tahong soup, spring rolls, ice cream and F R U I T S (yum)
It worked and we enjoyed it.
Happy Birthday Mahal!
Take care of your health. My one wish is for you to stop smoking.